... I had a long chat with her over the supper.

She was trying to figure out what went wrong ...abt why i was so upset.
I didn't wanna let her know ....
she kept on asking... or suggesting some things...and being nice, of course.

She:
1. ISB..u can re-apply next year.
2. that last lady who proposed u ?... why is there any guilt attached with u ? u have good amount of time to think about all of this. you are young and there is a whole life ahead... u made a correct decision. she didn't know u ... dun be upset...it is fine.

Myself...
wondering.. I wished I had this company forever: supporting, soothing, warm, pleasant friend.
but reality strikes... she is going to be away....

and the moments have started with different degrees of separation.
I have been shifted away....but that's fine since she would be near the person she needs to be for getting her work done. I like that professionalism ! Afterall, anyways, I am a consultant for them ;) and noone likes a consultant !

-------

Then started to conversation abt me to be shifted.
She was abt to say something and with complete interupption i spoke out the words.
About me knowing regarding the shift...

Surprised, she asked me how did I know abt it.

I wondered.....Elementary, my dear Bee.

Told her abt the communication reaching me thru other channels.
Also, told her about a dumbo reactin to it as if Bee getting rid of me. (Yes, I had a sinking feeling when my most hated master asked me abt the matter...but it was lightened after I talked with him and got to know it had just her genuine request in it)

Me: I am moving out prollie sooner than later.......
She: You were planning to stay here for the summer ( I dunno if she wud let my foodchain know....or dunno if she thot abt the activities we had thot abt earlier).
Me: .....wondering.... Tracy Chapman's song .....
Give me one reason to stay here and I'll turn right back around
Because I don't want leave you lonely
But you got to make me change my mind

Bee, I was thinking of keeping you happy, nothing else.

The fact was...there was no reason left for me.

As it is, ISB was a sad blow (I was thinking too high about myself and landed up with just no choice...and only my backup...the Shani effect ?...prollie yes..I have been really impudent on that front )

Inability to be present at mom's 50th bday in India was another blow :'(

Shift was the last one !

By Monday evening this week, I was pretty much down at the bottom of the pit :(


Later, other rejects.
Life is now accustomed to rejections !